Possible Agoraphobiac
Two recent instances are puzzling me.
Friday, I ran into one of Token’s pals, who was on his way to a promotion party. I had a quick errand to run but told him I would meet him there. I showed up and got as far as the doorway of the ballroom, but there were just too many people, conversations, and clattered of beer steins for me to handle. I bolted out of there so quickly I bet there are skidmarks on the carpet (if that kind of thing is possible).
Today, I was supposed to go on a volksmarch with some coworkers. I woke up several hours beforehand but the thought of being with so many other people on a 5Km walk that ends in a smoky beer tent was too much for me. I fell back asleep and woke up far too late to make it on time.
This disturbs me because being reliable is my #1 priority. People who bail on me, even once, are written out of my book of “People I Like”. Okay, I might forgive someone that I really liked or had a really good excuse, but those exceptions are few and far between. Yet I did it twice in the same weekend. Yeah, I’m a hypocrite.
I have got to get out more. This is pathetic.